All ego defense mechanism are employed to manage conflict that arise from the inner mental and external world.
They also help alleviate feelings pf distress and discomfort from the stage of consciousness.
One such technique we employ to manage anxiety and feelings of discomfort is by Turning Against Self.
We develop an inner critic to deal with both internal and external stressors.
Turning against self and Displacement.Â
Displacement is an unconscious technique that involves redirecting impulses from their original sources to a safer target. Turning against self, hence is a form of displacement where the safer and convenient target become the self.
Why we use Turning against self defense Mechanism.Â
1. To avoid external conflicts especially with parents or powerful figures.
2. To manage feelings of discomfort such as jealousy.
3. To manage guilt inducing impulses.
4. To avoid anxiety that may be cause cognitive dissonance eg; A child’s belief of ‘All parents are perfect’ may make her turn against self by self blaming or redirecting mean actions.
5. Sometimes turning against self gives us a misguided sense of control that makes individual responsible.
Examples of Turning against Self.
1. An individual who after a romantic heartbreak starts blaming himself for the mess or says I’m unworthy of love.
2. A young girl who was raised in a family where her needs were neglected internalizing this as a sign of unworthiness.
3. Self aggression isba common form here where an individual may cause themselves physical injuries.
4. One may take blame for a Partner’s infidelity.
5. The critical messages we internalized in childhood from Parental figures, caretakers and even society become internalized as harsh self critical voices. This leads to a low self-esteem.
6. When expressing emotions or desires was disapproved, we turn against our self with guilt or shame. Eg; “I’m bad for saying no” “I’m bad for requesting support “.
7. A child who expresses his excitement after winning and later shamed or made to feel guilt fpr showing off may turn against self.
8. Sigmund Freud initially defined depression as a condition where one becomes angry with others but decides to turn it inside. The popular saying goes like this; “Depression is just anger turned inwards ”
9. Sometimes to manage the discomfort, we might turn to sabotagive behaviours such as Gambling, Alcohol abuse and excessive promiscuity.
10. After failure, we blame ourselves for attempting or doing wrong.
11. In one case presented by Anna Freud , when a girl’s envy, jealousy, and hatred were in danger of activation, she maintained the fiction that she loved her mother, but felt herself to be full of hatred which she turned inside by despising and mistrusting herself. Turning her aggressive impulses inward helped her inflict upon herself all the suffering which she had formerly anticipated in the form of punishment by her mother. It’s an attempt to escape punishment.
How to Manage Turning Against Self.
1. Awareness – The first step to any form of change. Most of these defense mechanisms are unconscious in nature and may be hard to notice.
2. Acknowledging that the behaviour is external and might not be a reflection of your true self.
3. Learn to express those emotions safely. This might be through setting healthy boundaries.
4. Practice self compassion. Would you do that had it been a friend of yours? Transmute shame to gratitude. Transmute self hate to self love.
References
1. Geiser, F., Imbierowicz, K., Conrad, R., Wegener, I., & Liedtke, R. (2005). Turning against self and its relation to symptom distress, interpersonal problems, and therapy outcome: A replicated and enhanced study. Psychotherapy Research, 15(4), 357–365.
2. Henriques, G. (2016, April 13). Turning against the self: How it causes depressive cycles. Psychology Today. www.psychologytoday.com